Becoming our own best friends is a topic that is related to everything in my life. It has to do with how we relate to money, how we relate to time, and how we relate to others. It is not always in our best interest to be best friends with the people who appear in our life, whether by biology, by business, or by pure happenstance. I know of what I speak because one of my favorites sayings when referring to my siblings is that “I was born in a different hatchery.” Whatever has happened since that moment of birth, and I am the oldest, I have been so totally different that my sisters that relating even in the early years was difficult. And I kept on being different in oh so many ways, but because I have let go of that, I will not go further with that train of thought.
What I do want to share as we head into the holidays is that it is ok to be so selfish to become your own best friend first. Look at what is important in your life. Stop being your own worst enemy by putting the “shoulds”, “could”, and “musts” before your own needs.
As the organizer of multiple networking groups, I watch others trying to please others–family, friends, and business associates–first. There is nothing wrong in having the philosophy of “how can I help you?” But, please, become your own best friend first. Having more holiday invites than ever this year, one included an invite from a favorite family member. I wanted to go to see that person and several other relatives, but I really hesitated because my siblings would be there. There is no conversation occurring amongst us for only God knows why, really! But I put on my networking hat and had a plan, and it worked. If someone makes me uncomfortable, I stay away because I have learned to become my own best friend. I take care of me. I had a wonderful time with the people I wanted to see.
And no one felt my discomfort, including me. The bonus was that both of my siblings approached me with a holiday greeting and a hug–nothing more, nothing less. It was a good evening without any conversation, but that was ok. It is a good start to my holiday season.